Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Sex Without Commitment

Black and white! That is what I wore that night in the early '70's. I even had a long black scarf flipped around my neck that hung long and flowing down the back of my white coat. In fact the outfit I wore reminds me a bit of what Kim Novak wore when she was standing on the cliffs talking to Jimmy Stewart in the movie "Vertigo". I love black and white.

My friend and I were going to go dancing. My friend was a lapsed Catholic. She was no bigger then a minute, had born four sons of immense size, and she was divorced. When the doctor told her that her body couldn't tolerate another pregnancy she went to her priest for help. The priest told her sex was for procreating and if she could no longer participate in procreation she and her husband could no long participate in recreation. Her husband went looking for a woman that wasn't a good Catholic and found one sitting right outside his office; his secretary. Hence the divorce. Lapsed is a mild word for what she was. She was on a mission. She went full blown into the 70's and the sexual liberation. She was a class act until she got near a man and then she rolled over and went for it as fast and with as many, in as many different ways, as she could imagine. Sexual liberation for women ......... she took it to heart and other places.

Me? I had spent the first few years of the decade trying to differentiate between sex and love. You could have sex without loving someone. You could have sex just because you found the person sexually appealing. These were new concepts for me, the woman with the '50s morality. You could have sex just because you wanted sex! I had been told by a stream of 70's thinking men that I had "sexual hangups" because I wouldn't have sex with them on the first date. I didn't have hangup's. I had confusion. My friend, the lapsed Catholic, kept telling me, "Try it you might like it." Sex without committment. It was all around me.

The ballroom was so crowded that people overflowed into the foyer. The band was playing and the dance floor was full of single men and women trying to make a connection with someone that they had found attractive. As we strolled around the room looking for a table with two available chairs we could overhear men flirting and women laughing. The mood was a little light hearted and a little dark desperation. Everyone wanted to meet someone. My friend found a table. As we were jostling our way over to the empty spaces I turned and glanced across the room. There was a group of women that were standing together as if they were a delegation. They had smiles on their faces, but the smiles weren't directed at the many men milling about the perimeter of the dance floor. The smiles seemed to be directed at one particular person. It was a man. And the minute that I saw him he turned his head and saw me. Clear across that large room our eyes locked. He was the most beautiful man that I had ever seen. We stood like for what seemed forever and then he started walking. As he walked, women worked to get into his line of sight and I heard, "Hi Peter", "How are you Peter", "Save me a dance Peter", "Peter, how nice to see you tonight." He smiled at the women, but he kept walking.

The more he walked the more beautiful he became. The closer he came to me the more I realized that he had a sexual attraction that was beyond description. He approached me and said, "You are the most beautiful woman in this room. Can I buy you a drink?"

I smiled and answered that I had had that same thought about him and, "Yes I would love to have a drink with you."

He took my arm and directed me to a quiet corner of the bar and even as we sat there smiling at one another the women would approach and try to get his attention. We talked for a bit, but getting acquainted was difficult with women vying for his smile or touch. He suggested that we go upstairs.

And there it was! What my friend had been urging me to try. "The One Night Stand"

There was a sexual energy between us that was like a lit fire. There was the fact that I was in another city. There was the voices of my friends telling me that I'd be a fool to turn this beautiful man down. There was my own curiosity. I said, "Yes" and took his hand.

He was a good lover. He was over joyed at my enthusiasm. He was "blown away" at my unabashed love of sex and all things sexual. We had a wonderful time together until ......................................... the sex was over and he stretched and got out of bed and strutted around the room waiting for me to admire his "beautiful penis". He told me how many women admired his 'dick' and didn't I think it was the most beautiful 'dick' that God had ever created.

Frankly, a soft 'dick' is a soft 'dick' as far as I was concerned. Beautiful was not a word that instantly came to my mind. I dressed and got out of there before I started laughing.

And you know what, ladies? I couldn't get rid of the 'beautiful penis'. I patiently explained to him, in a way that I thought wouldn't damage his self image, that he had been an experiment. He was supposed to be a one night stand. One night stands don't call you the next day, and the next day, and the next day. They don't show up at your house beseeching you to go to dinner with them. One night stands are supposed to disappear after the sex, isn't that what all my friends had told me. Sex without committment! Problem with my one night stand was he expected the 'beautiful penis' to stand for more then one night.

The experiment was a failure and I never tried it again. My friends are still laughing.

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